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The most cucked jobs

Ranked by cuck score: a blend of the Bayesian average on the Cuck Meter (65 percent) and head to head Elo (35 percent), so one lonely five chair rating cannot top the board.

1. #1

   Chengdu Metro Line 13 operations monitor

   Sits in the open front cab of a fully driverless train, in full view of a carload of commuters, for the entire ride. Cannot use a phone. Cannot chat. Officially a…

   UnratedCuck score 50

   
2. #2

   Robotaxi safety monitor

   Rides in the passenger seat of a self-driving car, hands folded, smiling at strangers in the back so they feel better about it.

   UnratedCuck score 50
3. #3

   Self-checkout attendant

   Stands guard over eight machines and walks over every 40 seconds to tap a badge when someone puts a banana in the bagging area.

   UnratedCuck score 50
4. #4

   Human in the loop

   Clicks Approve. Clicks Approve again. Occasionally reads the thing first. Is legally the reason it is "responsible AI."

   UnratedCuck score 50
5. #5

   Long-haul pilot, 3 AM over the Atlantic

   Watches the autopilot fly a 300 ton aircraft over open ocean for six hours. Eats the crew meal. Says "roger."

   UnratedCuck score 50
6. #6

   Warehouse robot babysitter

   Watches a grid of 400 orange robots carry shelves around and walks out to rescue the one that got stuck on a dropped zip tie.

   UnratedCuck score 50
7. #7

   Sidewalk delivery robot remote operator

   Watches 12 video feeds of cooler-shaped robots and takes the joystick when one stares at a curb for too long.

   UnratedCuck score 50
8. #8

   Power plant control room operator

   Watches steady green gauges for twelve hours. Trains for years for the one day they turn red. Hopes it never comes.

   UnratedCuck score 50
9. #9

   Driverless train passenger service agent

   Rides a train that drives itself and stands near the front looking official in case anyone asks where Canary Wharf is.

   UnratedCuck score 50
10. #10

    AI pull request reviewer

    Scrolls a 4,000 line pull request the AI wrote, types "LGTM," and takes the blame in the postmortem.

    UnratedCuck score 50
11. #11

    Elevator attendant in an automatic elevator

    Stands in a hotel elevator that has had buttons since 1950 and says "which floor?" with dignity.

    UnratedCuck score 50
12. #12

    Parking garage booth attendant

    Sits in a glass box next to a gate that reads license plates, charges cards and opens by itself, and waves.

    UnratedCuck score 50
13. #13

    Autonomous tractor chaperone

    Sits in a pickup at the edge of a cornfield watching a tractor plow perfectly straight rows on its own.

    UnratedCuck score 50
14. #14

    Self-driving campus shuttle ambassador

    Stands inside a 12 mph shuttle and explains to every rider that it is, in fact, driving itself.

    UnratedCuck score 50
15. #15

    Content moderation confirmer

    Sees what the classifier already removed and presses Confirm so a person technically made the decision.

    UnratedCuck score 50
16. #16

    Robot bartender supervisor

    Stands behind the robot arm that makes the cocktails and restocks the limes. Gets tipped less than the robot.

    UnratedCuck score 50
17. #17

    Autonomous cargo ship bridge watch

    Stands a four hour watch on the bridge of a ship that steers, navigates and avoids collisions on its own. Drinks coffee at sea.

    UnratedCuck score 50
18. #18

    Drone light show safety officer

    Holds a big red button and watches 1,000 drones spell out a sponsor's logo in the sky.

    UnratedCuck score 50
19. #19

    Elevator attendant in a self-service elevator

    Stands next to the buttons all day, says "going up" and occasionally presses the floor you already pressed.

    UnratedCuck score 50